Picture this : you make plans with someone you like to meet up for coffee say Tuesday evening. They actually give you their last word that they will show up. In your mind you even choose what you will wear then, because well, appearances and impressions!
1 PM. You’re there having lunch all excited that you’re actually going to have a chance and sit down with your person. You’re extremely careful not to spill food on your clothes. ( Am I the only one who does this?) In your head you are just imagining this bomb ass convo you’re going to have with them. You just can’t wait.
5 PM. You were supposed to meet at 4 and they’re still not here. You wonder whether they got caught up in traffic or what. You tell yourself if they weren’t coming, they’d let you know in advance BC they’re grown ass human beings.
6 PM. Frustrated in a mat going home.You’re scrolling through your old chats with your person to see if you said something that offended them. Nothing! Every thing is just fine. There wondering ‘man, am I this terrible?’
Well, I have been meaning to write consistently since the year began. Third month already in and well, only 3 posts. In my head I have these scenes and stories that in my view would make great stories. Getting anxious in the middle of chores wondering when am going to sit down and actually write.
Wait till I sit down🙆. Words fail me and I stare at a blank page with only a blinking cursor. I flip through my notebook full of writing prompts and ideas I have stockpiled but nothing feels right. I check my stats but they’re not motivating either. Man, it’s the most frustrating thing I have encountered this year and it sucks…I wouldn’t wish it on anyone really.
You ask people how they deal with writer’s block and they tell you take a walk. Aje sasa? I wish they could tell me something more practical, like “have this pill- I have been using it for like 6 months now and its really effective. Once you take it you just can’t stop writing.” How cool could that be?😅
Anyway, maybe writing about it might make things better and make my creative juices start flowing again . Just maybe.